Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
this boner is exhausting
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
