yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
