K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
