i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize