biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
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