They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
