I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
one might say we're banned from that church
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize
