I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
