But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
Randomize