I can tuck mytits in my pants
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Randomize
