fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
