accomplished twins. life is a go
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
