So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize
