I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
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