Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Randomize
