You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
