id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
