Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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