If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
