I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
