i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
