just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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