2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
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