Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Randomize
