I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Randomize
