Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
