can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
