And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
We talked him into tasing himself.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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