i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
