I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize