my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
