i think my tv is drunk
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Randomize
