Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
