He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
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