He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
