If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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