doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
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