You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
My legs feel like baby dolphins
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