Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize
