So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
