Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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