the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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