i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
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