The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Randomize