I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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