Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(336): View more from North Carolina

There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.

(336): View more from North Carolina

This is god's gift to the unemployed.

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(918): View more from Oklahoma

My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...

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(602): View more from Arizona

So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.

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(360): View more from Washington

Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.

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(970): View more from Colorado

I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.

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(904): View more from Florida

Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.

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(631): View more from New York

We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts

(1-631): View more from New York

Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?

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(407): View more from Florida

he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty

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(803): View more from South Carolina

Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?

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