We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Randomize
