i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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