and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Randomize
