Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
