so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
So apparently I’m into choking now
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