I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Randomize
